The "Fallacy of Change" is a mindset where we mistakenly believe that our happiness and success depend upon others changing their behavior. We think that if we can just convince or pressure someone else to change, we'll get what we want and be happier. This distortion leads us to focus on trying to control others, rather than taking responsibility for our own happiness and well-being.
Example: A woman thinks, "If my partner would just be more supportive of my career goals, I would be more confident and successful."
Reframe: "I can take steps to build my own confidence and success, regardless of my partner's level of support. I can seek out mentors, take courses, and surround myself with positive influences. While it would be nice to have my partner's support, my happiness and success are ultimately up to me."
This reframe shifts the focus from trying to change someone else to taking personal responsibility for one's own happiness and success.